"Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it." Greg Anderson
Easy for him to say! All he ever has to do is wash and shave. That's because he's a man.

My journey starts with the FIRST BLOG; you'll need coffee/tea and probably some chocolate digestives, or maybe some Cadbury's Fruit and Nut, or Green and Black's Organic if you've got more money than sense.

Sunday, 19 June 2011

The 'Stella Is An Even Bigger Prat Than I Am' Story

Stella was having what you might call a stressy day. Her daughter’s car had packed up, so Stella was driving her around hither and yon, having completely gotten out of the habit of being chauffeur. At the same time she had her own To Do List to accomplish. On top of this she has several major deadlines coming up, personal and professional, which involve loads of work and organisation. And she’s also about to move, so her place is stacked to the roof with packing cartons. She's a busy woman. 

Anyway, her mobile rang. She was going to ignore it, too much to do, but quickly glanced at who was calling - Paul. Oh Paul! A potential date with whom she’d been in serious-ish, normal cyber conversation for a few evenings, chat that had culminated in a bit of flirty banter a couple of nights ago during which he said he’d get in touch by phone to arrange a date. They hadn’t talked the evening before because he’d been at his friend’s stag do.

Her: Hi Paul.
Him: Hi Stella.
Her: Nice to hear from you. Have you recovered?
Him: Er? What? Yes, I suppose I have. Are you busy or can we have a chat?
Her: Well, I am busy, but for you, I can always make myself very, very unbusy. (I can almost hear that cheeky, sexy voice she puts on…) What exactly do you have in mind, hun? (I know, I know – hun – I’ll have to speak to her about that…)
Him: We need to talk about a time.
Her: Hehe! For you - any time!
Him: Er… OK. Thank you. When would be convenient?
Her:  That depends on what you want to do, where you want to do it and how much time it might take.
Him: Sorry? I want to come round to your place, of course.
Her: Oh now, hey! I think you may be getting a little ahead of yourself there, don’t you? I’m not saying it’s completely out of the question, maybe, one day, but for the first time it’s not something I’d planned on.
Him: What? There’s got to be a first time. I can understand your not wanting to do it, but the sooner we start the better. You don’t have to put yourself out - tidy and clean will do.
Her: Oh dear. I think you have misunderstood me entirely. I’m not that kind of woman. I’d love to go for a coffee with you or maybe even dinner, but anything else at the moment is out of the question. Really. I’m sorry if I made you think otherwise.
Him: Stella, do you know who you are talking to?
Her: Yes, of course I do. Paul.
Him: Yes, Paul. Paul Barrington? The lettings agent? I’ve got some new tenants I need to show round…

Paul Barrington. The lettings agent. Last time she’d seen him at the agency he’d had a cold and was busy snotting it up into a tissue. 65 if he’s a day, 17 stone if he’s a pound. Probably never been on an internet dating website in his life.

PMSL!

Just how many Pauls does she have in that smart phone of hers? 

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG! This whole thing is too funny! Not only Stella's little faux pas (i bet the place will rent much faster if they know Stella is willing to talk dirty to any potential clients ;-) ), but that we wrote the same subject in posts 10 minutes apart!

Danusia said...

that's too funny! Oh my, I do feel for Stella, but I can imagine she managed to extract herself out of that situation with her usual aplomb!

Frustrated mum said...

OMG that's hilarious. The perils of mobiles - make it far too easy to say the wrong things to the wrong people. Try having an ex and a current BF with the same name. Never text drunk is the lesson there!

welshgoldigger said...

Oh poor Stella!Homes under the hammer was never like that. Perhaps she would like to Escape to the country.

Cousin Bette said...

MGTBID - This isn't the first time it's happened either. I tell you it's a parallel universe. How many more are there out there?

Cousin Bette said...

Frustrated Mum - I bet that's a killer situation! Have you ever actually done that?

Cousin Bette said...

Welshgolddigger - I haven't heard the aftermath of this. I can't wait to find out if there was one. I hope she at least has/had the decency to go a bit pink!

Danusia said...

Methinks you're enjoying this a tad too much, at Stella's expense!

Stella said...

Of course I didn't blush in the slightest, I extracated myself from the situation with my usual aplomb.